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The Lie We Are Told About Discipline
Uncover the Stoic truth about discipline: why becoming an athlete isn’t about willpower, but about identity, mindset, and becoming who you’re meant to be.
Paco Raven
July 01, 2025 • Estimated Reading Time: 7 minutes
TODAY’S FOCUSRethinking DisciplineFor the past few months, I’ve been struggling to run consistently. And what’s frustrating is: I’ve been here before. Years ago, I had the same struggle with going to the gym. Until one day, it just… shifted. I became the kind of person who trained. Running doesn’t feel like that yet. I don’t see myself yet as someone who runs. I’ll need to get into a state athletes have pursued since the beginning — not discipline, but something far deeper… |  |
Welcome to The Stoiclete — a slow newsletter for athletes who refuse to be one-dimensional. Each edition brings you a personal insight, an honest take on performance, and tools to train your body, sharpen your mind, and live a life worth showing up for.
Let’s dive in.
— Paco Raven
REFLECTIONS IN MOTION
Talking discipline through the lens of impact
When I scroll through social media, I see the same message over and over: “Motivation is overrated. You need discipline.”
It sounds powerful, especially with the music and edits. But it’s not practical. Sure, discipline might carry you through the first few months. But if you want to train consistently for years, it has to become more than just a habit.
The Stoics believed sport should be more than a hobby. It should be part of who you are. When it becomes your identity, it feels effortless.
Yes, there will still be days when you dread going to the gym. But you’ll go. Because you see yourself as someone who trains. That’s just who you are.
Why should you care about making training part of your identity?
The Stoics believed every person has a telos (Greek for end, goal, or purpose). They taught that your telos is not focused on what you want to achieve, but on the kind of person you must become to achieve it.
Epictetus believed you become your identity by practicing it daily. First, decide who you want to be. Then prove it with your actions. Every workout isn’t just training. It is also practicing the character you want to become.
You prove to yourself, day by day, that you are someone who trains consistently, and when you look back, you realize training is no longer just a routine; it has become a part of who you are.
First say to yourself what you would be; and then do what you have to do
Where relying on discipline often goes wrong
Most people I speak with about training rely on motivation or willpower to get themselves to train.
The ones relying on motivation are never consistent—maybe for a few weeks, then they stop.
The ones who rely on willpower do better: they go consistently for a few months… but then they burn out. They lose the fun. It starts to feel like they have to.
It's utopic to think you’ll always have motivation—or that you can outlast your willpower forever. The best athletes didn’t rely on that. So why should you?
And when people hear this, they say: “Just have discipline.”
Sure, showing up with discipline will work for a while. But if you haven’t built the foundation underneath, it won’t feel natural.
You have to know why you show up every day. That’s how it becomes automatic like breathing.
THIS WEEK’S STOIC INSIGHT
A moment this week that taught me something
Live from S’hertogenbosch
Last Saturday, I attended a networking event to get inspiration for the next steps of The Stoiclete and to connect with others. We were matched into small groups, and everyone was open to helping each other.
The best tip I got at the event had nothing to do with my area of expertise. But it gave me an insight that changed the way I look at building The Stoiclete — and what it can become.
It may have been a small tip for him, but for me, it sparked a big mindset shift.
On the way back, it got me thinking. I remembered a quote from Seneca:
“We are members of one great body, planted by nature. We must be helpful to one another.”
We all have different careers. We may look and speak differently.
But what we share is that we are human, and our duty is to help one another so that the whole can improve.
How to make training your identity the right way
The right way to approach this is to make training part of your identity and your routine. It has to become a habit that keeps returning—automatic, like brushing your teeth.
You do this by seeing yourself as someone who trains consistently 2, 4, or 5 times a week. It’s not optional. It’s just who you are.
Alongside that, plan your training in advance. Know what you’re going to do before you enter the gym or step out the door. That way, you don’t waste energy deciding; you just show up and get to work.
If I could use one technique to get in the flow, it would be this
If I could only use one technique to make training a part of my identity, it would be this:
Plan the days you will train, and combine it with one non-negotiable rule on training days, you will always go for five minutes.
No matter how tired, busy, or unmotivated you are, you show up.
And after five minutes, if you still want to leave, you can. No guilt.
But here’s what happens: 9 times out of 10, you stay.
Because the hardest part isn’t the training. It’s getting started.
Once you're moving, once you’ve stepped into the gym or hit that first stretch of pavement, the resistance fades.
It’s not about intensity. It’s about identity.
And this rule is how you protect it: one small promise at a time.
It won’t be easy, but by practicing it every day, it will slowly become who you are.
TRAINING IN PRACTICE
What I’m Building With
▶ Current exercise I am testing out: Building strength with the 5×5 protocol
▶ What I am reading: Turning Pro by Steven Pressfield
▶ One quote I’m obsessed with: The only way to deal with a unfree world is to become so absolutely free that your very existence is an act of rebellion - Albert Camus
END ON PURPOSE
One question to ask yourself today…
Ava with Milo in their van
How can I use this obstacle as an opportunity?
When we choose to live, we will inevitably find obstacles in our way. We can choose to let them define us or use them to help us get to our goals.
Most people stop at the setback. But if you pause and ask this one question, you might uncover a path you hadn’t even imagined.